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1213d ago
egidem1213d ago

Reading the title made me laugh!

brish1212d ago (Edited 1212d ago )

Sad part is it wasn't meant as a joke.

This is what kotaku considers "game journalism"! wtf?!

Kingthrash3601212d ago

Mario doesn't either
*Brain explodes*

PhucSeeker1212d ago (Edited 1212d ago )

@brish "Video game dicks are hard" ! Seem like a joking-around article to me.

FarEastOrient1213d ago

Won't be long before the modding community fix that problem.

b_one1212d ago

There is no processing power able to render that thing.

aLucidMind1212d ago

This shall spark a revolution in dong physics! Certainly nothing is more important!

Tapani1212d ago (Edited 1212d ago )

@b_one

Hahah! you made my day! :D

CrashJones1213d ago

He's a grower, not a show-er.

Dee_911213d ago

boy kotaku has turned into grade a gaming journalism... besides, he has a bath scene early on, you can see some sort of penis, not that I was looking.. so not only is this stupid, its wrong.

pixelsword1212d ago (Edited 1212d ago )

It's not the size of the boat, it's the 1080p, 60fps definition of it in the ocean.

Kingdomcome2471212d ago

Your username is perfect for this article, lol.

DragonKnight1212d ago

Newsflash to Kraptaku, 99% of all video game characters do not have genitals. Makes one wonder why gender is so important to some people doesn't it?

aLucidMind1212d ago

Maybe him not having a penis is important to them because they've taken the fact you can sword-fight the wrong way.

gamey1212d ago (Edited 1212d ago )

Dude, get over it. It's funny. And your comparison sucks balls because in most games there aren't balls to suck but in this one there should be (balls to suck). And Kotaku is called Kotaku. Don't be immature.

DragonKnight1212d ago

@gamey: It's not funny, and it's Kraptaku. When you publish 99.999999999999999% s*** articles, your name is officially changed to some variant of fecal matter. That's internet law.

And unless this game actually has gratuitous hardcore sex scenes, then no there shouldn't be balls because you would never see them anyway. This game couldn't sell with hardcore sex scenes, so what you're seeing is softcore porn where you never see either the male's or the female's genitals anyway. If you think this is funny, I'd say you're the immature one.

Dee_911212d ago

i demand penis NOW!

-kraptaku

ChrisW1212d ago

@Dee_91,

Yeah... I bet you do!*

*(to be taken lightly)

3-4-51212d ago

Barbies don't really have Vaginas either....so whats the big deal ?

gamey1212d ago

Because Barbies don't have full-frontal sex scenes. I hate to crap on your analogy but you missed the concept of "context". So...*crap*.

kenwonobi1212d ago

The game heroes just have such large cocks like us gamers that we all have to tuck it right?

aLucidMind1212d ago (Edited 1212d ago )

Everybody knows Geralt can pole-vault with his junk! It's canon that his size is so incomprehensible that our brains just can't render it... Polygon totally just confirmed this is canon ;)

+ Show (9) more repliesLast reply 1212d ago
Septic1213d ago

I knew the women were faking it all along. Story of my life

iiorestesii1212d ago

This is the most awkward I have ever felt in a comment bubble

1213d ago Replies(3)
Bathyj1213d ago

So he's an angel then?

1213d ago