“That's because I don't get it.”
Freddy the Mouse.
After Microsoft's press conference on May 21, 2013 a lot of gamers and gaming publications took to the internet determined to share with us each of their two cents. Some, well most of them actually, are enraged with Microsoft's new product, while others believe that E3 will resurrect the Xbox brand once again in the eyes of core gamers everywhere.
In case you were visiting the Amazon forest and, after getting separated from the tour group managed to get captured by extremely muscular Amazonian women that forced you to mate with the whole tribe non stop for the entire month of May, you probably missed Microsoft's press conference. Fear not my agoraphobia suffering friend I'm here to get you up to speed.
Excerpt from the diary of Freddy the mouse trapped under the Microsoft conference stage.
21 May 2013
"Dear diary, today as I was looking for cheese, I've stumbled across this giant tent in the middle of campus. Nobody noticed me entering as they all had their heads buried into those black glowing things. I was thinking that this place had something for me inside but I was wrong. This tent has a huge center stage with a symbol of a round cheese well and an X etched into it. Now being a cheese “connoisseur” I've thought this to be the Xcelsior Brand of cheese and proceeded underneath to sneak underneath the stage. At one point the lights were replaced by this green tinted fog like luminescence.
As I was searching underneath I heard a man starting to walk overhead. The humans started making a lot of noise. As he walked he managed to dislodge a piece of the supporting structure which, as my luck would have it, landed right on top of me. Needles to say I was stuck. This heavy thing had “Arrogance Inc.” written on it. And I thought it to be ironic, as arrogance is indeed a heavy thing to bear.
Seeing that I had no means of freeing myself I did the only thing I could do. Wait and listen to what the humans were doing.
I found out that the X symbol was not for the cheese brand but for something called a console. And here the humans were unveiling the latest model which they were calling the Xbox One, the third generation video game console made by this brand. The name confused me, but that was nothing compared to what followed. So there it was a new gaming console. I've always loved video games, I find it to be the most entertaining things the humans ever made. But people up there were talking about TV. About switching channels very fast and alternating from games to movies and back to TV in the blink of an eye. Everybody was silent, well except those in the back with the Microsoft logo on their T-shirt. They seamed to love everything said on stage with a such passion.
After the TV guy was done, he was replaced by someone else that started talking about the technical characteristics of this thing. At one point as the guy was talking about something called “rocket science” I pooped myself as the wight was pressing against my stomach. Still no talk of games up there. Then the "scientist" was replaced by some other guys that started to finally talk about games, generic with a small interest for a new console games. Still the crowd was silent except the “hooligans” in the back. Then strangely I heard women voices on top, women at a video game console launch event. My cousin Larry who got stuck underneath the PS4 stage and wined about not hearing woman talking, would have loved it.
Although there were women on stage they had nothing to say, nothing of interest anyway, something about a movie or something.
Then they started talking about sports again, American sports and American TV, so it's clear that my friend Pierre in France will not need, or be able to use these features.
I dozed of for a second and woke up as the word “dog” forced my eyes open. “They are talking about dogs now?” I thought to myself. It seamed that dogs were a focal point for some game that uses the same engine as the last one with some minor modifications and...dogs...that bark and...are members of your squad...yeah.
I lost consciousness again only to regain it a few minutes later. The conference seamed to be over. Humans were busy all talking to each other. Some were saying that this new console needs to connect to the internet every 24 hours. The guy in who's house I live couldn't use it then as he hooks up to his dumb neighbors WiFi who has the bad habit off shutting down is modem when he is not at home., and was cheap when it came to buying a data plan for his internet connection.
Some other guy said that games will have mandatory installs on the 500Gb Hard drive. Drive which seems small even to me ….a mouse. And that games will also feature an unique product code that will allow that game to be played on one profile alone.
This means that the guy I live with won't be able to trade games with his friends anymore and will have to stop buying cheaper used games. If he starts to buy full priced games he will gave less money for cheese, less cheese means less cheese crumbles and that I don't like.
I was starting to really hate these green guys.
Then they said that the box while in standby, have the camera and microphone still on. Well that means that I won't be able to dance naked with my banana when my guy is not at home without some dork somewhere watching. And probably recording and likely posting on YouTube. “Freddy and the Banana” I'll get one million views in an hour. Hmmm that's not bad actually. I'll be famous. “Note to self, record dancing with banana”.
Anyway after the humans were done talking, some other humans started tearing down the structure. One of the guys found me and lifted the heavy thing off of me, mice gods bless his soul. I crawled back to my sweet home with one hell of a story to tell.
About how numbers after 360 start from the beginning, skipping the zero. About a game console that seams not to care much about games. About restrictive policies that in the end will harm all consumers including the cheese eating population. And finally about how some people's arrogance can ruin your day."
We were expecting problems with mod support, but there are a lot of other issues.
This is why you get the GOG version on gog you can select the version of the game to download.
On pc fallout 4 fallout new vegas and skyrim are all broken on steam because they all got the same "next gen" update.
Skyrim dec 2023
https://www.pcgamer.com/sky...
Can not find new vegas but anyone that modded it knows the script extender there was also broken
Not accidental, they want modders to stop modding their older games to force them to mod Shitfield.
There doing the same on starfield with a mods store and blocking mods
There goal is like blizzard and what they did with fallout 76 you make mods they can sell and you become a slave.
On skyrim they have "trusted" mod devs now basically a badge that lets your mod on the store you get a crumb of the sale when someone buys it.
lol to the disagrees, the last Skyrim update broke mods too. They've been trying to kill mods to monetize them in creation club for years, it's not a stretch that they purposely put out patches just to break free mods.
The disagrees are from people who have common sense. They aren't trying to kill mods. Most mods for any game will break with a new update because they rely on files/code that have been changed. This isn't new. Even with Bethesda this would happen way before the creation club. Mod support is literally one of the things that got Bethesda to where they are, and they're one of the only devs that releases comprehensive mod tools for each of their games.
Over 14 GBs and doesn't change much at all? What? Taking up that much drive space for a pathetic 'remastering' is shameful.
Par for Bethesda.
As of right now, there are no monopolies in the games industry, and for the sake of the medium as a whole, they never should either.
And yet the biggest tech companies in America are essentially that. They buy up all the small comps only to kill them off and steal what they have, and if they can't buy em they bleed them to death.
Eventually they’ll realize the value is with the employee not the company. Buying an IP means nothing if the people who contributed are let go. They’ll get it one day.
tech is different because they buy threats and then kill them. Twitter bought Vine and did nothing with it. Despite people seemingly liking it. Could've had tiktok a decade before bytedance. go figure.
They buy IPs not talent. That's why these buyouts never work and the IPs die. Right now it's too expensive to develop games - but I expect that to shift maybe as AI tools can make it easier. The best games have been indie games for awhile as big developers fuck their ips to death with "games as a service" -
A voice actor from The Coalition's third-person shooter series, Gears of War, has hinted at a new game announcement coming in June.
Hopefully Microsoft will go back to the original story line and get away from that woke nonsense from the last Gears game Gears of Woke! But were talking about Microsoft so all the betting money is on more of the same woke nonsense.
the X1 going for the Wii crowd and PS4 going for the core could turn out to be something great, it gives games a better platform for success on a single console, and keep the gimmicks to the X1.
I can understand you Freddy, I dozed out a few times myself during the conference even though I didn't mean to.
You're right, Pierre won't need all that slick stuff, nor will Mario, Paul, Franz or Dimitri.
But I think Pierre is looking into opening a restaurant, Mario says he likes to get out and play adventurer with his brother Luigi and Franz will play Crysis on the PC.
Paul will probably buy a PS4, I don't know what Dimitri is going to do though, maybe looking for falling comets.
This console seems to have been built for our friends Average Joe, that lives in NA, likes sports very much and cannot wait a couple of weeks to play additional COD maps.
He maybe likes Halo, but then he would realized the "new Halo" may be multiplatform, called Destiny and with exclusive (non timed-exclusive, just exclusive) content for PS4.
Something that really impressed me though was this power of the clouds.
I live north so we always have many clouds, even during the summer so maybe I will buy an X1 to take advantage of all my clouds (when it's sunny I'll just get out to play outside). When I play Forza online I will beat all those that live in California or Florida since my car will run faster, powered by the clouds.
Maybe it is not fair, but it certainly is amazing, isn't it?
Ivy