Why Real Gamers Won’t Be Buying BioShock Infinite

The review scores are off the charts, but Gamers Association editor Luke Frazier is urging gamers everywhere NOT to buy BioShock Infinite. These are his reasons why.

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smashcrashbash1640d ago

Those are your reasons? Are you kidding?

Derekvinyard131640d ago

Real gamers need multiplayer? To the author, how old are you? Judging from your reasons, you are the furthest thing from a real gamer let alone a gamer bioshock isn't a rushed series it's well thought out. Piss off you admit to not even playing it, lets get your review after your pirated copy starts working. "I haven’t played BioShock Infinite yet because my pirated copy still won’t run right,"

Bimkoblerutso1639d ago

Pretty sure it was a stab at satire, only it was the kind of satire that is unnecessary and verily unfunny.

That's right. I used the word 'verily' in a sentence.

Gaming1011639d ago

In case anyone didn't get it, this is a satire article. It's not meant to be taken seriously, as evidenced first and foremost by the ridiculous title and premise of this article.

Get a grip people!

Winter47th1639d ago Show
TheBrownBandito1639d ago

I think you meant "This article is flame bait."

seanpitt231639d ago (Edited 1639d ago )

Well iam a real gamer have been since 1990 when I was 5 years old and I DID buy this game and have really enjoyed it this game dosnt need mp because the story is brilliant and the mp would been a disappointing add on that's why iam happy they focused all there attention on the story

TI_211639d ago

They even tagged the article with a satire tag. ;)

DragonKnight1639d ago

Writers who aren't funny shouldn't attempt satire. This made me laugh, but in a "this guy is so stupid" kinda way.

REALgamer1639d ago

*looks at article title*

*looks at own username*

*looks at Bioshock Infinite box sitting on desk*

Well, I think that pretty much disproves the article...

jrbeerman111639d ago

maybe this is satire... but its still a cheap attempt for hits, therefore I will not read this article or click the link.

Darth_Bane791639d ago

It was satire. A joke, his article is not for real. Read it throughly and then his comment down below and you would see that he is just joking

Danteh1639d ago

I thought it was a nice article, if only because of the subtle satire which became apparent upon reading the first paragraph but only became completely clear with the multiplayer bit.

Plus the comments are hilarious, full of angry people xD

In case you didn't notice, the author says he loves Zelda, some more games, AND Bioschock, so he surely loves this game, definitely one of the MASTERPIECES of this generation <3

omi25p1639d ago Show
shauzy1639d ago

i'm not proud to say this but, my pirated copy worked for me, and i'll buy the game on my next salary.

RememberThe3571639d ago


In case you didn't get it, satire is supposed to be funny.

Sideras1638d ago

Yeah I just skimmed through the crap and saw that line you quoted, nevermind the fact that the copy is pirated but he haven't even played it.
And really multiplayer? So I'm not a real gamer, well fuck him and his multiplayer.

Canary1638d ago

Fun fact: the only people who care about terms like "hardcore gamer," "real gamer," etc. are casual gamers.

+ Show (15) more repliesLast reply 1638d ago
Root1640d ago

I know right

To be honest a "real" gamer would buy a game if it didn't have multiplayer since most older gamers before this gen were used to good, long, solid single player games.

sobekflakmonkey1639d ago (Edited 1639d ago )

Yeah, I don't know what this guy is talking about, I was personally extremely happy this game didn't have multi-player, I don't really need it, a lot of games fail to have a decent multi-player, look at pretty much every game, the single player is usually where it's at and then the multi-player is just sort of there, the list of games that have horrible multi-player is ridiculously long, so I'm glad they put so much focus on the single player, the guy who wrote this article is a chump.

Also, forgot to add, this guy hasn't even played the game, so everything he says is just complete garbage and doesn't make a whole lot of sense.

IAmLee1639d ago

'Why Real Gamers'... Let me just stop you there... there are fake gamers now?

DragonKnight1639d ago

Haven't you ever heard of gamer gurls?

MysticStrummer1639d ago

"there are fake gamers now?"

Sure there are. Look at Call of Duty sales.

Just kidding.

Sort of.

InTheZoneAC1638d ago

fake gamers...the new generation of adhd kids that think everything must be call of duty

you know, the one's that like fake music, like justin beiber or all the rap they can find

you know, the one's that didn't have any real cartoons to watch, instead they all had teenage drama shows

you know, the one's who don't know what life is like without facebook and twitter

those are the fake gamers...

ArchangelMike1639d ago

From the article, - "I haven’t played BioShock Infinite yet because my pirated copy still won’t run right..."

I hope this is a joke.

You haven't played Bioshock Infinite, and you think you are in a position to judge and critique the game?

You're website just got down voted for trolling.

HammadTheBeast1639d ago

It is a joke.... although he didn't mention in the headline, which makes it automatic flame bait.

RedDeadLB1638d ago

You do realize it's purely satirical? Nothing in this article is true, it's a freaking joke.

But you don't understand those things which are beneath you, oh great and righteous one.

ajax171639d ago

I know!!! And to say BioShock 2 is better than BioShock?! And he's upset because of the delay. So I guess he won't be buying The Last Guardian either. I know I shouldn't get angry, he's just troll after all.

JsonHenry1639d ago

Lol, don't feed this troll hits on his site please.

MoveTheGlow1639d ago

Oh man, he got me good. By the "No Multiplayer" part, I was laughing my butt off. Cheers, mate.

Just beat Infinite two days ago, instantly one of my favorite endings of all time.

Flavor1639d ago

The reaction to this clumsy satire says quite a bit about N4g users, and internet users in general.

That they are shallow, stupid men who only ever read the first headline or bold faced text in a newspaper or magazine,

Who act like children, and jump at the first excuse to display misplaced emotion over toys and games, since their real lives must be totally devoid of emotional stimulation or attachment.

You want some real titillation? Bioshock infinite was a badly written, sloppily constructed mishmash of different ideas thrown around in brainstorming sessions with a hackneyed and trope plot. And it was SHORT because they have a raft of DLC planned for you suckers.

Irishguy951638d ago (Edited 1638d ago )

While I haven't finished B:I yet and would give it 8/10 so far...I agree with your comment about N4G users. The amount of retarded comments saying the same thing about this obviously stupid just pathetic. I don't know whats worse, how unfunny this article is...or how the users of N4G take humanity to new depths of idiocy

Also, i'm fine with Satire, but I just didn't find this funny. The reactions to it should be either it is funny or it isn't...not "God are you serious? What stupid reasons" or "I hope this is a joke".

callahan091639d ago

Am I the only one who notice the entire article was just sarcasm?

Ravenor1638d ago

Reading the article, you can definitely tell if you have some level of competency reading words typed in a row.

People on N4G really need to cool their jets and slow down.

dirthurts1639d ago

Real gamers read real articles.
This isn't such article.

Jio1639d ago

It's a troll article...

People on this website need to understand a joke, you could instantly tell it was a joke with the second point.

Slapshot821638d ago

I get that this is supposed to be satire and all, but all I'm seeing is an unfunny post to attract a lot of attention here at N4G for this site. If you hadn't noticed, it usually doesn't keep people around when you do things such as this - satire or not.

zerocrossing1638d ago

The N4G userbase needs to mature a bit, if we cant enjoy a bit of satire regarding our hobby then we shouldn't complain about not being taken seriously.

Slapshot821638d ago

I think you're missing my point. I have no issue with satirical articles; in fact, I usually enjoy them. With this particular piece though, I simply didn't find it funny in the least.

Ken Levine truly touches on some deep issues that are still found within our society in America still today. He brings these issues to life in videogame format to challenge them head first - I have the utmost respect for him for doing just this.

There's a lot of meaningful things that can be written about BioShock Infinite, some of which I'll publish myself. So when I see a journalist completely overlooking these things to draw in hits by creating satirical themes from a game that should be written about for opposing reasons - I'm free to state my opinion, just as you are to yours.

You should also think twice before you tell someone to be more "mature" next time as well.

zerocrossing1638d ago

This is why I leave a disclaimer if Im righting satire... some people are just too thick to get it.


Troll article and everyone is falling for it...

showtimefolks1638d ago

I am a real gamer bought it and enjoying it a lot

What the heck is a real gamer and a fake gamer?

g2gshow1638d ago

Some people just want attention simple noting to see here move right along folks just another lame with a keyboard

3-4-51638d ago

I used to play real games in the early 90's.

Don't preach to me about multiplayer. we created our own fun in single player games with multiple kids around just because we could and it was fun.

Story based games should always be single player focused.

This OP is on crack.

TheXonySbox1637d ago

This is one of those games, done with the franchise; boring and uncreative feels like every other game i've been playing recently.


+ Show (17) more repliesLast reply 1637d ago
porkChop1640d ago

I really don't like articles like this. The author tries way too hard to be funny, but he just isn't.

TheMrFraz1640d ago

Thank you. At least you realize it isn't serious.

coolbeans1639d ago

Don't forget to note porkChop mentions you tried way too hard to be funny in this piece. Key piece of advice to remember in the near future.

3-4-51638d ago

That isn't the point.....

If you have to try that hard to be funny....your not

Funny is spontaneous...random and real

Th4Freak1639d ago

Ikr, wonder how did this got approved...

zerocrossing1638d ago

Is it not funny because you like the game too much? Think about it if it was in regards to a franchise you didn't care for would that make it better... idk maybe not, I just think we need to be able to laugh at stuff like this so as to not take our hobby too seriously, the games good no one can deny that so why should it need defending from pure satire?.

porkChop1638d ago

I'm not defending the game from satire. I was saying the satire itself wasn't funny, because I don't believe it is.

cpayne931640d ago (Edited 1640d ago )

Is the author trying to make a satire or something? Not sure if serious. I don't think so. Either way the article is a mess.

JimmyDanger1639d ago

It's got to be satire. It's a pisstake on the modern entitled gamer.

A few lines gave it away for me - " there's a reason we all hated ICO" and "awesome co op games like ARMY OF TWO".

Also the "it must have been delayed twelve times" and comparing the 30 months from announcement to release to the decade long Duke Nukem Forever development time - it's positively dripping with satire, exaggeration - even the introduction about "this 90 metacritic rated game that everyone thinks is so good" being poor because he decides to compare his opinion on a preview or two he say (he makes pointed references throughout that he hasn't actually played the game) - it's like some illinformed, over opinionated forum fanboy rant given breath and made flesh - a cutting piece of postmodern satire.

Entertaining stuff.

TheBrownBandito1638d ago

"a cutting piece of postmodern satire. "

You're drunk right?

jc485731640d ago

see what Call of Duty did to people or rather kids?

dedicatedtogamers1640d ago

I think that the game isn't worth a full $60. The storyline and linear gameplay and lack of freedom were all a letdown for me.


I'm happy that plenty of people are enjoying the game. The reasons the author gives are just stupid. It's probably satire. He says at the end "I haven't even played it because I can't get my pirated copy to work yet, but I heard the game was racist".

fallensniper771639d ago

The storyline, linear gameplay, and no freedom were a letdown? I'm pretty sure those were the positives of the game, they were my favorite parts actually and it does have a lot of freedom if you keep in mind it's not an open world game