Greetings everyone, it's your friendly neighborhood Raven Nomad aka The Crapgamer. Recently I have been thinking of a way to give back to all the wonderful people here. That led me to coming up with a way to draw in even more members to the site. I have come to realize that a lot of people aren't exactly sure how to jump into topics and discussions around here. So this is THE comprehensive list of what to do and what not to do in order to fit in at N4G.
Do-Have a strong opinion, just make sure it's the same opinion as everyone else around here. N4G isn't the place for people who think for themselves.
Don't-Like the Xbox 360. We all know the Xbox 360 is total trash right? So we should all just act like it doesn't exist.
Do-Post Japanese game and console sales, because that's where Sony is #1 and that's what we all care about!
Don't-Post American game and console sales, because we all know the United States doesn't equal the world!
Do-Enjoy handheld gaming, just as long as it's not on a Nintendo handheld.
Don't-Mention how awful the name PlayStation Vita actually is...just not going to get you anywhere.
Do-Be a hypocrite. Usually this is a bad thing, but not here. N4G is the place to be if your a hypocrite. A good example of some hypocrisies here would be. You complained about how bad Peer to peer online was for Call Of Duty, but when you heard that it was also peer to peer on Uncharted 3, you suddenly thought P2P was the best thing since sliced bread.
Don't-Like Cliffy B. He actually enjoys Microsoft products without getting paid to endorse them. He also really likes Kinect, so obviously he is the devil.
Do-Like David Jaffe. Apparently people around here think Cliffy B is annoying and don't like him, but Jaffe who is the most annoying jackass in the gaming industry is loved here. So you gotta follow the crowd and love the guy!
Don't-Mention that Kinect is successful or that 90% of the N4G crowd predicted it to fail and be the next 32x.
Do-prefer games with 30 frames per second as opposed to 60 frames per second.
Don't-Like Call Of Duty or anything made by Activision, apparently they are evil for releasing a franchise every year that the masses love just the way they are, yet the people here think they need to go back and change everything.
Do-Like EA, I know, I know...it was hard for me to write. EA has long been known for their monopoly with the NFL games and releasing literally the same sports games year after year, but this year they have Battlefield 3 with 30 FPS, 4 person squad based chat, vehicles for spawn trapping! and were assuming a version for Xbox 360...but that has yet to be confirmed as we've seen no actual gameplay footage for the console as of yet and it's only three months until it's release. (fingers crossed)
Don't-Bring up Sony's utter lack of smarts for getting their PlayStation Network hacked and shut down for almost a month. Also it's probably not a good idea to mention that Sony brought on the hacks themselves by "poking the bear" so to speak, when they took Geo Hot to court.
Do-Like motion controls, as long as they are "Hardcore", which pretty much means they have to be on the PS3.
Don't-Mention that Nintendo has totally smacked the competition this generation.
Do-Make excuses as to why Nintendo won this generation. Some of my favorites are "The Wii is only owned by mothers and casual gamer's" and "Everyone owns one, but they are all collecting dust"
Don't-Ever mention that your interested in a Kinect game or Kinect integration.
Do-Pirate movies, music and games
Don't-Jailbreak your PS3 though, that's drawing the line. Piracy is fine as long as it's not on the PS3.
Do-Talk a good game, make sure whenever a new Sony product is coming out you say things like "Day one buy!" and "$599 US dollars isn't too expensive, I'll just get a second job!"
Don't-Actually buy the products you claimed were "Day one buys".
Do-Pretend party chat isn't an important feature for online gaming.
Don't-Ever mention things like Riiiiiiidge Racer or flipping giant crabs over and hitting them for massive damage!
Do-Approve this Blog!
Don't-Take it so seriously.
MonsterVine: "Shuffle Tactics from Club Sandwich struggles to balance difficulty with fairness, leading to an experience more frustrating than fun, even with accessibility options turned on."
Publisher Nacon and developer KT Racing shared new details and a trailer of the upcoming racing simulator Endurance Motorsport Series.
MonsterVine: "Lex Imperialis expands Rogue Trader with a gripping Arbites storyline, morally complex choices, and the standout companion Solomorne Anthar. A must-play for 40K fans."
This is a pretty fair summation of what N4G is like, sure there is a bit of trolling in there, but not so much that it should be failed.
A few things you forgot to mention where that users must claim any upcoming Kinect game that looks hardcore is actually on rails without any evidence showing that this is the case (look in the comments for any Ryse article and you'll see what I mean).
Or what about how users must insist that the only games on PC that look better than teh Killzones and Uncharteds are Crysis and maybe Battlefield 3 (although obviously the PS3 version will be nearly as good if not the same as the PC version), and even then you need to spend $2000 to get a decent frame rate.
And of course that users must claim that The Last Guardian will be GOTY without a doubt, even though they havent even seen the game in action much if at all.
True Blog. N4G Is Like 1700's Britain Where You Have No Opinion
Yep, this is mostly the case with N4G. I disagree (is that allowed?) with a couple of the points but mostly it's accurate.
Do-Write lengthy blog posts trolling PS3 fans.
Don't-Point out the irony in a stealth tirade against PS3 fanboys, even though anyone writing such a thing would have to be an awfully dedicated Xbox fanboy himself.
Do-Disagree with anyone pointing out the obvious fanboy trolling. Hey, the person may be dead on, but by golly, I still don't like it!
Pot calling kettle black.