8CN: My original plan for this article was to check out the bios for the four new revealed Mortal Kombat X characters and brutally make fun of them. Fighting game bios are some of my favorite pieces of video game writing. They are either so bare bones and trope ridden that they could be used to justify almost any character or they are transparent attempts to justify an artist's super cool character design. Even better is when a series has gone on as long as Mortal Kombat has, spawning movies and television series along the way, and must justify it's increasingly brutal grudge matches with inter-dimensional revenge plots and twists and turns that only the most devoted care about and only the mad expect to make any sense.
Upon this jutting, rocky outcrop I choose to crash my ship of the mind. NetherRealm doesn't feel like revealing the bios of their new characters until the game is released then I am just going to make them up for my own maximum enjoyment. None of this is official. None of this is based on rumor. I'm making this shit up as I go along. It's all in good fun, so just sit back and enjoy.