hennessey86 (User)

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"loving MW3, Forza 4 and Uncharted 3"

My next gen predictions

hennessey86 | 1044d ago
User blog

1: The next xbox will have kinect built in which will allow the console to navigate the house with the built in wheels it comes with, Microsoft will all so offer the option of "Kinect hoover" which will come packaged with a kids game called "Kinect chores". This will leave parents very happy until they realise you need an Xbox platinum subscription to access the wheels and hoover. Microsoft will also introduce a paid button service, only the d-pad and one analogue stick will be usable out of the box. A season pass will be available to unlock the rest of the buttons for 12 months. Due to Sony buying every publisher in the world Microsoft only have one game available at launch, Halo 5. Halo 6 will release two years later with Microsoft plugging the gap with endless DLC including Master Chief vs Master Chief extreme. Call of Duty will no longer be produced after EA threatened Activision with nuclear war after they took over Iran in 2013.

2: Sony starts off the next gen by purchasing every developer in the world and puts them all to work on GT6 so it will be ready in time for the 2016 Olympic games, where GT6 will be the main sponsor of the 100 metre Veyron sprint even though its still a standard car. In the mean time Sony concentrates on having 35 exclusive games a year, including two killzone games every 6 months and a God of War game every week free through Playstation plus minus plus negative. With Sony buying Epic games Gears of War is now a Playstation exclusive and now has Sly cooper as the main character, along with Ratchet and Clank. This causes outrage with the fans, causing Sony to include Marcus Fenix as a DLC character. Sony's capture of EA also signals the attempt at world domination by Sony when all PS4's become self aware on the 23rd of October 2014. People soon discover that the Blu-ray disc drives are actually weapons of mass destruction, capable of levelling whole cities by the press of the triangle button of death. Sony's control of the earth means Microsoft live in secrecy at the north pole and the next Xbox will only be available at underground markets where they also sell HD-DVD drives for people who's lives have been destroyed by the the Blu-ray.

3: Nintendo decide to pull out of the console race after Mario is caught in bed with Luigi losing his squeaky clean image, he claims he was set up by Sonic the hedgehog. Which becomes believable in 2015 when Sonic 306 comes out exclusively on Sony's console. The Wii U is banished to the moon and is never seen again, but the wii is still used to showcase how good the Move really is.

4: The biggest shock next gen is............................ ........................Nathan Drake is finally outed as a transsexual, previous name Lara Croft. He completely denies the allegations, but is seen trying on his old outfits during Celebrity game characters on ice. In which he loses a close final to kratos, who is the publics favourite after he slays three of the judges for giving hem less than perfect scores.

Just my attempt at humour, hope you like it :)

pandaboy  +   1042d ago
pretty funny
BiggCMan  +   1042d ago
This shit had me in stitches!!! Very unexpected, very funny!! Great job!
ThatHappyGamer  +   1042d ago
ROFL
ThatHappyGamer  +   1041d ago
omg what's with the disagrees. O_o
UnagiMaster  +   1042d ago
hahahaha, good stuff.
Flatbattery  +   1042d ago
I liked it, looks like the stealth disagreer didn't
Flatbattery  +   1042d ago
Seriously some people need help, it's only a bit of fun.
Ingram  +   1042d ago
Funny! a lighthearted and absurd dystopian near future.Almost realistic at times.
hennessey86  +   1042d ago
Thank you everyone
As for the disagrees, I cant please everyone. Part 2 under way. :)
ThatHappyGamer  +   1041d ago
can't wait
mechlord  +   1041d ago
TY for the royal laugh :)
newflesh  +   1041d ago
Not bad not bad)
ElsaLietzu   1041d ago | Spam

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