Sephris (User)

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"Walking poodle skirts."

How Video Games Can Save Our Country

718d ago ... Minions! I know you are eagerly awaiting my review of Borderlands 2 and to see if, in my ever omnipotent view, it could rise above what has been coined as the greatest game of 2012, the almighty Guild Wars 2. And to you I say...piss off! You voted for my far superior and deliciously eloquent female counterpart over me. And now you must pay by waiting ever longer! Hahahahahahahahaha! Well, at le...

Guild Wars 2 Vs. Borderlands 2: Which Is The Better Game Part 1 - Guild Wars 2

751d ago ... Greetings my ever loyal minions! I know that you have been anxiously awaiting my return, and just to make you yearn that ever little bit much more for me, instead of returning when I was able to, I spent the next several days at home entertaining myself with two wonderful new sequels to games that have already made smash hits with the original games that spawned them. And after long nights with...

RaiderZ –A Bold And Beautiful New MMORPG

796d ago ... Once in a blue moon something comes out that you don’t want to take your hands off of. Something so entertaining that is so delightfully different than what you are use to that it sticks to your mind like warm cotton candy that is so delicious that you spend the night dreaming of it and are happily not disappointed when you realize you have woken up and it wasn’t a dream. RaiderZ is just that k...

Guild Wars 2 Stress Test - More Stress Than Test

812d ago ... Today Guild Wars 2 put out one of its last stress tests to those who have pre-purchased the game and are able to get in on the betas they offer. However, with an hour into the stress test the problems have started rolling in. To start with, the first half an hour of the stress test was nothing more than error messages when trying to sign in. Fans dashed to the Guild Wars 2 Facebook site to c...

Inside The Creative Minds Behind RaiderZ - An Interview With Mark Hill Part 3

814d ago ... (Continued from pt. 2) Sephris: Many online games have chosen to jump the rift from PC gaming by expanding to game consoles. Have you thought about bringing RaiderZ, or any of your other games for that matter, to the console market? Mark: At the moment, we are concentrating solely on the PC version of the game. Of course, we are always open to new opportunities to reach new players if we...

Inside The Creative Minds Behind RaiderZ - An Interview With Mark Hill Part 2

814d ago ... (Continued from part 1) Sephris: The other day an email of mine was hacked and shortly thereafter my grandmother received an email from me wanting to show her pictures of my new male dungeon partner. He was a strappingly large black man in studded leather straps with a disarming smile and twinkling, trustful eyes. I've had a wife for over 10 years and I still had to dig myself out of a hole...

Inside The Creative Minds Behind RaiderZ - An Interview With Mark Hill Part 1

814d ago ... Imagine living in a world where you and your friends can mob together and beat the hell out of everything around you that dared take a breath in your presence. Then, during a huge feast in glorious honor of your victory, a meat fight breaks out, steaming roast legs of lamb spattering their succulent juices in the faces of those you hold most dear to you. When the aggression is finally out of yo...

Gaming For The Mentally Impaired

840d ago ... One of the greatest things about being me is having joined the ranks of breeder which means no matter what happens there will be a part of me that will live on for eternity. But sometimes fate throws you a curveball that you have a hard time dealing with. You see, while I have one boy that is perfectly normal and will take over the family business of evil and mayhem, my younger son is something...

City of Steam - A Phoenix Rises Out Of The Ashes Of The MMORPG Universe

842d ago ... While this may come as a shock to my adoring pawns, there are things I love. I love the distant screams of the tormented. I love duct taping small animals to ceiling fans. And I love when independent game companies come to me to write a review of their game alpha or beta. Why? Because they need me to make their crappy game look good. And nothing is more satisfying than a grown man groveling. So...

Should God Be In Video Games?

843d ago ... Let us start this out with a belief there is some entity far more amazing than myself. I know this is a difficult task, but since it is conceivably possible, though unlikely, let us assume this is the reality. And we shall call this being "God." When this God is silent he is doing great deeds. When he speaks to someone, (or at least when they claim he does), innocent people die. (Wow...I actual...

Lollipop Chainsaw: Where More Than Just Zombie Moan

846d ago ... A question for you my little worker ants. What happens when you take a bunch of horny game programmers and give them the monetary capitol only huge corporations such as Warner Brothers can offer? No, they don't buy prostitutes, nor do they pay their little sisters to come to the company party. At least not when I am invited. No, what happens is they sit in front of a screen and try and compens...

Skyrim's Dawnguard - When Sucking Doesn't Suck Pt. 2

849d ago ... There are other crappy things about being a werewolf as compared to a vampire. Neither of them can open locked doors or pick up items when in their monster state. But a vampire can go in and out of his Vampire Lord shape at will. Werewolves can't. Vampires can feed suck life out of pretty much anything and it grows their perk meter. Werewolves have to eat corpses of humans to move up the meter...

Skyrim's Dawnguard - When Sucking Doesn't Suck Pt. 1

849d ago ... Greetings minions! Today I want to offer you depth and insight into the new downloadable content for Skyrim called DAWNGUARD. And the first thing I have to say is: Why the hell did you wait so long to put it out, Bethesda?!?! When I buy a game, I expect an over priced, crappy add on within the first couple months. But did we get that? Say hell no, Sephris. We didn't. I played my dark little hea...

Heroes And Generals: A Road To Victory Or Just Another Bomb?

904d ago ... A few days ago I was asked by one of the N4G staff to be part of a pre-beta event for the game Heroes and Generals. After congratulating them on their wise choice of candidate picks, I read over the agreement that was given to me and found something called a non-disclosure agreement. This means that I could not brag about how I was better than you for getting into this pre-beta extravaganza, bu...

4 Better Alternatives To A Final Fantasy 7 Remake

905d ago ... Final Fantasy VII was hands down one of the most memorable games ever made. Its graphics, for the time, were groundbreaking, the storyline was vast and deeply immersive and the One Winged Angel song was perhaps the best song ever written for a video game.It is no wonder that people want it remade, but perhaps Sony's decision to never do it is a good thing. After all, think of all the other poss...

Love Is In The Air(Raids)!

912d ago ... They say love is in the air. Just turn on a radio station that plays 70's music and you can hear it in almost every song they play. But if that is true, then the world should be a happier, albeit smellier, place. So what happened? How could things change so much in such a relatively short amount of time? All you really need to do is look at where you are now and you can begin to understand wha...

The Kinect Is Ruining My Life!!!!

913d ago ... Back in the day I was awesome. I was a world famous quadralathalete. (To self: think they will buy that? Yeah, it sounds technical enough). I won so many gold medals that I melted them all down in an effort to be rich enough to take over the world. And I would have except no one wanted to buy gold bars that had melted ribbons in them. And they smelled like cumin. (Thanks for the tip, Dr. H.). I...

Guild Wars 2 BETA: WOW or Just a WoW Clone?

913d ago ... Guild Wars 2 has just released it's first open beta and I was lucky enough to be part of it. 5 years ago I was delighted to be part of the first real PC RPG that offered no subscription fee to play. It held some benefits over World of Warcraft, but it was severely lacking in the group interaction. So, how does Guild Wars 2 stand up? Taking into account this was just a beta, and not the full...

Hey bro, I heard you like achievements?

914d ago ... We live in a world where children need to be coddled. Even when they don't do anything special, they need to feel like they are above the norm just for their ability to breathe. No more are the days of being called a dumbass for the stupid things you do. Now you are just "less understanding" in the things you fail at, and you are patted on the back just for getting off your lazy ass and giving...

Star Wars Xbox 360 Bundle Pack: Show Me your Dark Side, I'll Show You Mine

922d ago ... A Few Days Ago... In a House Far, Far from Yours... A STAR WARS XBOX 360 KINECT BUNDLE WAS OPENED!!! Like most geeks, I have been a fan of Star Wars since I first saw the inner thigh of Carrie Fisher in Jabba's Palace in Empire Strikes Back. Of course the whole Force thing and the lightsabers were cool too. And growing up with a butthead of a father, I hoped my dad would one day fal...
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