Nearly 50 percent of 26-year-old paralegal Philip Jenkins' encoded long-term memories involve button combinations, game-playing experiences, and spatial-cognitive maps of various levels and worlds from Nintendo's line of video-game consoles, a team of neuroscientists reported Tuesday.
The memory-evaluation study, headed by Dr. Franklin McCarroll of New York University's School of Psychology, revealed that approximately 47 percent of Jenkins' hippocampus is dedicated to storing notable video-game victories and frustrating last-minute defeats, while 32 percent of his amygdala contains embedded neurological scripts pertaining to game strategies, character back stories, theme songs, and cheat codes. In addition, his entire dorsolateral prefrontal cortex is devoted to remembering the time he did a helicopter dunk from half-court with Shawn Kemp at the buzzer to beat the Charlotte Hornets 82-81 in NBA Jam: Tournament Edition.
"Nearly 50 percent of 26-year-old paralegal Philip Jenkins' encoded long-term memories involve button combinations""" """
LOL HE GIVES NEW MEANING TO Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, A, B!"
"The JOEY has Spoken"
You can't honestly believe this. I mean for goodness sake! It's from The Onion!
Really really sad!!! I feal bad for the dude!
I love the Onion
I saw this today and didn't think of submitting it to N4G! I could have gotten the points! Damn it.
Then again, that's not fair, this isn't news anyway!