Jon Blyth: "Oh, Alan, you made it. I suppose you’d better come in. On reflection, it was probably best that you didn’t turn up for the Vista housewarming. I mean you were supposed to be the guest of honour, all that DirectX 10 hoo-hah, but truth be told it was a shit party. Anyway, we’ve both moved on, and… Alan, you’ve been working out. Did it just get hot in here, or are you a 14GB download? Let’s go upstairs."