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Jim Sterling’s Super Innovative Review Guide

"See? Reviewing isn’t so hard. Follow our guide and you’ll be a pro in no time!" - Jim Sterling

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mmorpg.gamezone.com
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barefootgamer2579d ago

Love the article's grading scale for games! It feels so true these days...

HolyOrangeCows2579d ago

"To get you started, here are a few helpful words that you might like to use in your review: Innovative, unique, inventive, innovative, breathtaking, amazing, gorgeous, innovative, brilliant, innovative, new, fresh, exciting, innovative, superb, ICO, innovative, graphics, clever, genius, innovative, blacklisted"

"10: Perfect game (our game most likely deserves this)
9.0 Excellent game
8.0 Pretty decent game and still good enough for a Metacritic bonus so use it if you must
7.0 Absolute shit that only games without big publishers deserve
6.0 Not used
5.0 Not used
4.0 Not used
3.0 Not used"

Hilarious and truthful article. I love Jim's reviews. Some are jokes and some are serious, but it's really not that difficult to decipher which they are.

His Vanquish review was spot on. The developer said that if you're playing Vanquish like a cover shooter, you were playing it "wrong". But as Jim pointed out in his review, one of your only up close combat options drain you of all of your strength, leaving you vulnerable. So what are your options? Play the game "wrong" or die.

Ashriel2579d ago

"The developer said that if you're playing Vanquish like a cover shooter, you were playing it "wrong". But as Jim pointed out in his review, one of your only up close combat options drain you of all of your strength, leaving you vulnerable. So what are your options? Play the game "wrong" or die. "

I don't think developers said "go straight foward towards the enemy" as a way to play it right as well. It's a mix between attacking at high speed (and using bullet time) and using cover to recharge if the suit overheats. Something the reviewer failed to grasp.

pimpmaster2579d ago

well i guess what this guys doing is taking the 6-10 and just making it 1-10 i always took this guys score for flamebait but i guess its just a more accurate way to score games.

ThatArtGuy2579d ago

Lots of truthiness there.

BYE2579d ago

This is some highly entertaining stuff.

Jim Sterling delievers again!

Akagi2579d ago

The Jim Sterling guide to reviewing: Give a good game a low score.

coolbeans2579d ago

At least he's not afraid to do it.

kancerkid2578d ago

A nice little comment by a person who has never read a review by Jim (Akagi)

HolyOrangeCows2579d ago

Translation: Give a faulty game game a lower score, make people with low standards cry.

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