Whoa, hey there Splatterhouse, long time no see. What’s it been? Seventeen years? Really? Well then, it may be no surprise if readers have never heard of you. For the uninitiated, Splatterhouse was a fairly shallow, side-scrolling beat-‘em-up originally in the arcade so very long ago, and then it moved on to consoles, spawning two sequels. Now people are getting yet another “reboot” but this time of a positively ancient series.