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Sex and Videogames

NowGamer takes a look at what videogames have taught us about Sex.

God Of War II

If they didn't want it they wouldn't be there.

Kratos is a furious bundle of muscled rage, which makes him quite the hit with the ladies who don't see his gore-splattered torso as anything other than a visceral signifier of his sexual majesty. Barebreasted and primed for a goosing, God Of War's chicks are always well up for it, and since extra health orbs are on the cards, who could deny them? Those who don't like their lovin' to be in the form of a prescribed series of button presses, that's who.

If Kratos wants to dip his wick he's going to have to play a bit of Simon Says. Press this button, now this one, now this… all the while the camera frames a statue of a urinating cherub whose increasingly frothy flow matches the sounds of the three-way banquet of lust.

Lesson learned:

Topless women will wait for eternity for the arrival of any mentally deranged nut-job and his hungry groin, but they know exactly what they want and precisely which buttons must be pressed.

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