A person's taste in zombies says a lot about their personality. For starters, a lazy zombie theorist might say fans of fast zombies, like those brain cravers in Left 4 Dead, are suckers for shallow action pics with quick cuts. That's an unfair, bitter generalization. In reality, or at least in my head, fast-zombie fans fear the unexpected-frightening, knee-jerk ghouls that leap through walls or bolt between vacant alleys. They're the post-9/11 zombies, zombies for men and women that know danger doesn't just come as a slow, plodding terror, like the Soviets in the Cold War, but as burning fast flash, instantaneous and world-changing.