When a game features a hero named Konki the Stellar Guardian and a bad guy called Dr. Dark Matter, the review sort of writes itself. It isn't the absurd childish character names that make Evasive Space an awful slog though; it's the controls. This WiiWare top-down shooter with a twist (there's no shooting) is based on an impressive premise of escaping every nasty situation that enemies throw at you, which gives the game an addictive puzzle vibe. Unfortunately, the game is also based on the not-so-impressive premise of using the Wii Remote to guide your every movement, which is just about as enjoyable and as painful as slamming a car door on your hand. Repeatedly.
* Having to evade enemies instead of shoot them is interesting.
* Control scheme is a total mess
* Level design is far too exacting
* Time limits are too tight.