SEGA is Like a Hot Girlfriend That Can't Read

Andrew Weymes of The Nightly Gamer writes: "As the title bluntly proclaims, SEGA is like a hot girlfriend that can't read and repeatedly fails to spell her own name properly when asked. She's certainly fun most of the time, but sometimes she says something so full of idiocy that one has to hold back a slap. The Nightly Gamer does not condone the abuse of women in any form. The above is an analogy concerning SEGA."

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Sangria3557d ago

Next step: Sonic with guns. Or does it exist already?
I think Sega should either abandon Sonic as mascot in the profit of another one (like Sony with Crash Bandicoot) or either listen gamers and stop injecting poison in Sonic's veins hoping it will make him cool and family-friendly.

Whereas making expensive 3D games that fail because of the lack of gameplay duration and mixing the franchise with another dirty idea to slower the game and make it more longer, why don't they do a classic Sonic game in 2D, to show how much a 120 fps Sonic in 1080p would be awesome?

Games like Patapon, LocoRoco, LittleBigPlanet (even if it's not exactly 2D) or BlazeBlue showed that the 2D is not dead and can be a true artistic twist. Stop stylizing Sonic to make it "cool" for young, focus on games quality.

MrWeymes3557d ago

SEGA seems so worried about game length when it comes to Sonic games that they just put bizarre nonsense in the game to fill time. I honestly have no problem with a 4-6 hour Sonic game that consists of psuedo-2D levels similar to the ones in Sonic Unleashed.

I would have paid an extra $10 to get the werehog portions of Sonic Unleashed removed from the game. If I wanted to play a terrible brawler, I'd travel back to 1999 and pick up some PS1 game that got a 3.4 on gamespot.

Elven63557d ago

Likewise, a 3-4 hour Sonic game that people like would be awesome, all they need to do is to show people Sonic is still viable in 3D, they did it with the Sonic Adventure games, why not now?!?!

Should probably mention pricing it at $39.99 would be great to boot.

gaffyh3557d ago

Can websites stop doing these stupid analogies please! They're getting more and more ridiculous everytime.

MrWeymes3556d ago

Never. My analogies will get more and more odd as time goes on. lol

Dark_James3556d ago

Sonic with Guns? Look at the game "Shadow the Hedgehog" it's pretty much there.

lordgodalming3556d ago

He says in the article, "Why doesn't Nintendo just give Mario a water powered jetpack?"

My memory is a little shaky with this, but didn't Nintendo already give Mario a water powered jetpack in Super Mario Sunshine for the GC? And didn't it work out pretty well?

MrWeymes3555d ago

I was being sarcastic. Mario Sunshine was a pretty good, but it's considered the worst of the series by most fans and critics. However, I liked it.

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Gun_Senshi3557d ago

Just here to see the pic :)

El_Colombiano3557d ago (Edited 3557d ago )

Bubble to who ever gets the link in a large format!

El_Colombiano3556d ago

Thanks Pain, but you get a bubble regardless of weather you gave links or not! Why are you so low on them??

Gun_Senshi3556d ago

Pain always flames PoG and company. They hate him lol

TheColbertinator3556d ago

Pain is an interesting member on this site.Though I do miss the open zone antics of Pain =)

El_Colombiano3556d ago

"Pain always flames PoG and company. They hate him lol "

LMAO EPIC. Pain gets bubbles from me every time I see a post.

@ the pic above,


MrWeymes3556d ago

Ask my girlfriend. I found it in her documents. :)

JaPo3556d ago


That's a drawing.

I'm leaving now.

BTW Ithinkthesonicfranchiseisdoome dandtheyshouldfocustheirefforts onsomethingmorefoolproof.

+ Show (8) more repliesLast reply 3556d ago
AKNAA3557d ago

So your definition of a hot girlfriend is a Hentai animated chick? LOL!!!(gets out the Lube) funny sh1t...

Cartesian3D3557d ago

Imo God most take a note from Anime artists .. :P Next time with these kind of chicks people wont invent anything, because they will busy f***ing eachother.. who needs electricity or TV when you have sth like that in your home(may be they wont even invent home )


hope my GF wont recognize that its me

MrWeymes3556d ago

I just couldn't resist using that picture. Her bust was so alluring.

Sir Ken_Kutaragi3557d ago

You see a Stunning Babe at the Bar, Looking at you, you go up to Her, she seems to like you, she says 'Lets go back to mine'
You think 'OMG!!!I'm in'(So to speak) ;-D Then she takes your hand, but you pull her back and take out your Pen and say 'Could you Spell your name please???' She can't, you Leg-it!!! ;-D

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