Honest Gamers: "Oh, A Vampyre Story. Let me love you. Why won't you let me love you?
A tricky one, this. In parts, it's one of my favourite adventure games of recent years; in others it's a nasty disappointment. It alternates between being side-splittingly hilarious and decidedly bland. It looks marvellous until the main character clips straight through the scenery. And, despite its wonderful intentions, it spoils it all with poor, poor lies.
One of A Vampyre Story's main faults lies in unfulfilled promises. The game box talks of lead character, aspiring French singer-come-vampire Mona De Lafitte, escaping the spooky castle where she's been kept captive, and embarking on an incredible journey to follow her dream of singing opera professionally. It all sounds wonderful, silly, epic and tantalising – and it is. Until you realise the 'embarking' part is literally all there is to it."