It was human burger bar Elvis Presley who, in 1964, sang the immortal lines: "Viva Las Vegas turnin' day into night-time/ Turnin' night into daytime/ If you see it once/ You'll never be the same again." Apparently, American songwriter Doc Pomus wrote these lyrics having never been anywhere near Sin City. He knew enough to know better. With its signature sprawl of mega-resorts scattered through the arid desert basin of Nevada like toys across a sandpit, Vegas beggars belief.
Of course there's a jet-black pyramid hotel with the world's brightest spotlight bursting from its peak; of course there's a hotel with a full-size basketball court in one of its rooms; of course there are bars full of Barbie-blonde hookers with epic cartoon breasts; and of course we just barged past Dennis Hopper to go and watch angry men fight in a cage, alongside Queen of Porn Jenna Jameson and a gaggle of Playboy bunnies.