No Man’s Sky Offline Mode Created After Developers Got Tired of Finding Planets Named After Penises

As reported in the latest Edge magazine, players can discover the infinite universe of No Man’s Sky without having to play online. It was originally not a high priority goal for the team until they discovered that over 70 percent of nameable objects were named after a penises. Every planet, every animal, and every plant can be named by the first discoverer. The team at Hello Games admitted that they knew what was coming but never thought it would be this bad. (Satire)

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Rimgal1488d ago

“It only got worse when I actually landed on Cocktopia and discovered an animal named Dicksucker33. Apparently, Dicksucker1 to Dicksucker32 were already taken.”


I know it's satire and most satire article are really bad. But this is one is really funny. I hope this gets aproved.

scark921488d ago

I would find No Mans Sky alot more entertaining if I found such names on creatures xD

RyuCloudStrife1488d ago

Lol at least satire isnt on the headline... I was actually falling for it until I finish reading the description. Good one though I would have actually had a good laugh if not spoiled....

WeAreLegion1488d ago

Hilarious. I can see it actually being like that though, if you actually find another player's planet.

Rachel_Alucard1488d ago

Captains log Fartgate 69

We've landed on planet recently discovered by Xx_MLG_420_w33d_Sm0ka_Xx who identified the planet as Titooine. Many of the denizens were identified as belonging to the Assmunching subspecies. Rare Flora known as cockandballs grew in many places around the "Ass Crackandreas."

This is Captain Dickhard signing out

MasterCornholio1488d ago

If you see anything called bunghole that would be my doing.


Oh and I need a planet TP in my game. I must have it.