I warn you before you start reading, whilst this is by no means a professional review of the game, it is laced with witty sarcasm and spoilers so tread carefully.
"this is by no means a professional review", you just lost any credibility right there.
That's not a loss of credibility, it's a surrender of it. Most game reviewers have less right reviewing games than moldy sponges, what difference is there?
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