WC: Mario made his first appearance way back in 1981 in the classic arcade game Donkey Kong. Since then, the little Italian plumber has gone on to star in a whole scores of games, all of which have given us the same image of Mario, the lovable good guy who will fight for the downtrodden by jumping on the heads of their oppressors. He is a character so adored that Nintendo can stick him in a bunch of dull mini-games, call it Mario Party 35 and it will still sell bucket-loads.
Children across the world follow his exploits with nothing but joy and excitement, never realising that they are actually idolizing one of the most irresponsible and downright awful characters in the history of the world. It is my unfortunate task to have to reveal to you all just why Mario is in fact the worst thing to happen to kids since the BBC in the 1970s. Seriously.