90°
Submitted by DanjHobbs 706d ago | opinion piece

How I'm Using Video Games To Plan My Massacre

Ciaran Utting Writes: I don't have any real friends. You know, one's you can trust. I'm kind of angry at the world, but can't assign blame to anyone in particular. Maybe some corporations or something, like McDonald's. Except I do like cheeseburgers. Still, I have to express my rage somehow, and I better go down in history for it. Rather than talk to my loving parents, or seek professional help, I'm taking the easy way out, and I'm taking innocent people with me. I plan to commit mass murder. I'm also a 'gamer'. (Call of Duty: Black Ops 2, Culture, Hitman: Absolution)

GreenRanger  +   706d ago
Aww, his first massacre.
They grow up so fast...*teary eyes*
#1 (Edited 706d ago ) | Agree(17) | Disagree(0) | Report | Reply
MariaHelFutura  +   706d ago
Google AI will be sending this straight to the FBI.
MattyG  +   706d ago
And they would be smart to disregard it as it is clearly satire... OR IS IT?
prototypeknuckles  +   705d ago
heres how im gonna plan my massacre
1-get some pokeballs and go to the zoo maybe capture some bears, tiger, eagles, spiders, lions, and screw it ill get a horse

2-im going to india to look for a dagger that can control time, no one will fuck with me then

3-im going to hire a hedgehog and a bandicoot to troll all the scientist in the world

4-lastly im gonna kill some gods and demons and turn them into weapons like an electric guitar, or a giant 200lb mallet

yea world domination, XD
MattyG  +   705d ago
We have similar ideas with some key differences;
1- I would capture the gods and demons in the Pokeballs and release them into say, a shopping mall.

2- In lieu of a dagger, I would find alien blueprints and build a Crucible in space. On said Crucible an AI will appear and will strangely take the form of a child you saw once in your life. This Crucible will give you three clear cut choices (destroy gods running rampant in mall, become one of the gods or allow the gods to continue rampage).

3- Learn the language of the dragons and shout people to death.

4- Rig Megaton to blow. Negative karma, but I'll gain it back by giving money to the church in Rivet City.

5- Use my 1337 skills from COD to master real life weapons, because we all know COD is a combat simulator. Really, I'm wondering why the military doesn't use it, it worked out for Anders Brevik.
prototypeknuckles  +   705d ago
oh damn.....your good, this right here evil mastermind of the decade people. XD
ChrisW  +   705d ago
The best way to do a video game style massacre would be with Kirby.

Add comment

You need to be registered to add comments. Register here or login
Remember
New stories
20°

Halo TMCC and GTA V Cyber Monday 2014: Finding The Best Deals

20m ago - Techtorial: Here are the top spots to get Halo The Master Chief Collection and Grand Theft Auto V... | PS4
20°

Reality Check - Why Do We Change Gender? Character Creation Psychology!

21m ago - Reality Check takes a second journey into the psychology of character creation, focusing this tim... | Culture
20°

Video: Let's Play Captain Toad: Treasure Tracker

1h ago - Eurogamer: "Greetings Nintendo fans - if today's launch of new Pokémon and Smash Bros. wasn't en... | Wii U
20°

Pokemon Omega Ruby Review - Digitalchumps

1h ago - DC: "It’s difficult to accept that it’s been over 11 years since the release of Pokemon Ruby and... | 3DS
Ad

Win a ROKU 3 or AMAZON FIRE TV

Now - Find out how you can win your choice of a Roku 3 or an Amazon Fire TV on Filmwatch. | Promoted post
30°

‘Never Alone’ Review | Analog Addiction

1h ago - Analog Addiction - "Not only does this latest title provide a solid gameplay experience, but is a... | PC