70°
Submitted by Xbot360 658d ago | opinion piece

Being New – Or – The Wii-U’s Playground Torture Party

By Zach Fox

Shaky legs. Mildewy sweat forming along the top lip. Eyes dilate and breathing becomes labored. It’s your first day and you’re absolutely sh****g yourself.

Being new is hard.

It’s not often in life that you have to literally become a juxtaposition to survive; the very idea intrinsically denotes a bizarre paradoxical death. When you’re hungry you cannot both eat and not eat, when you meet someone you cannot be both polite and rude, when you’re falling you cannot both float and fall. Each time you will die, be it from malnutrition, a beating or nature’s biggest bitch: gravity. When you’re new however – whether in school, a job or even a public toilet (maybe) – you’d best be ready to bend a scientific principle or two. (Nintendo, Wii U)

Add comment

You need to be registered to add comments. Register here or login
Remember
New stories
20°

Dynasty Warriors 8: Empires Coming Westward

8m ago - Koei Tecmo announced that Dynasty Warriors 8: Empires will be available in both Europe and the Un... | Xbox 360
10°

Star Trek Online Details Released On Starships

8m ago - Good news for the Star Trek Online fans who are eagerly waiting the latest starships, new informa... | PC
20°

Duck Dynasty Video Game Gets PS4 and 3DS Box Art

8m ago - Hardcore Gamer: It's amazing that the publisher that brings us the mega-budgeted Call of Duty, Sk... | PS4
10°

Danganronpa Spreads Despair To Sega’s Chain Chronicle

8m ago - Monokuma will invade Sega’s hit free to play RPG, Chain Chronicle. The iconic Danganronpa charact... | PS Vita
Ad

Top Xbox One Exclusives to Look Forward To

Now - What are you excited for? Here are the ones we're really getting revved up for. | Promoted post
10°

PlayDevil: Disgaea 4: A Promise Revisited Review

8m ago - PlayDevil has reviewed Disgaea 4: A Promise Revisited for PS Vita Here's a snippet: "It's a... | PS Vita