Note: THIS IS SATIRE.
Quote: "A few nights ago I was browsing the internet as I usually do, totally not looking for porn or anything of that sort, and I stumbled upon a very interesting link entitled halflife3beta.com which when clicked on, shows a countdown timer and the words, “Rise and shine…”
Naturally, the Valve fanboy in me went crazy with anticipation with one half of my person attempting frivolously to drum into my head, the words, “it could be fake,” but it didn’t matter how many times I told myself that in an attempt to calm down, I kept thinking of the next iteration in gaming’s holy grail and going wild again.
That was, until I stumbled upon a realisation which I thought I would share with you all today. I believe I’ve uncovered Valve’s ultimate plan, wait let’s try this again, I believe I’ve uncovered Valve’s Ultimate Plan®. Hear me out for a moment, as I list all of the possible threequels that Valve still owes the world. And by owes the world, I mean have yet to release, not some self-entitled fanboy bullshit. What? "